Coping Toolkit
50 Things to Try When You're Struggling
Stress and distress are part of being human. That doesn't make them easy, and it doesn't mean you have to white-knuckle your way through them alone. This list is a starting point, not a prescription. Some things will work for you and some won't, and that's okay. You know yourself better than any list does.
A note before you scroll: coping strategies are genuinely helpful, and they also have limits. Sometimes what we're carrying is bigger than what we can manage on our own, and that's not a failure. If you're in crisis or feeling unsafe, please reach out for support. You can call or text 988 (Suicide Crisis Helpline, available 24/7 across Canada) or call 911 if you're in immediate danger.
Anxiety and Worry
Box breathing: inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4. Repeat.
Write down everything you're worried about, then close the notebook.
Name five things you can see, four you can hear, three you can touch, two you can smell, one you can taste.
Go for a walk without your phone, even just around the block.
Say your worry out loud to yourself. Sometimes hearing it changes it.
Make a cup of tea or coffee slowly and pay attention to the whole process.
Remind yourself: "This feeling is temporary. It will pass."
Put on music that you find calming or familiar.
Tense every muscle in your body for 10 seconds, then release completely.
Ask yourself: "What do I actually know to be true right now?"
Overwhelm and Burnout
Do one small, completable task and stop there.
Step outside for five minutes. Just five.
Write a "done list" instead of a to-do list.
Lie on the floor. Seriously. Let the ground hold you.
Say no to one thing today, even something small.
Give yourself permission to do less than you think you should.
Eat something nourishing if you haven't.
Ask someone to sit with you, even without talking.
Close all your browser tabs. All of them.
Set a timer for 20 minutes of rest with zero productivity attached to it.
Grief and Sadness
Let yourself cry if it's there. You don't have to manage it away.
Look at photos or objects that connect you to what or who you're missing.
Write a letter you'll never send.
Sit outside and watch something move, like trees, water, or clouds.
Call someone who knew what you've lost, even just to say their name out loud.
Do something that honours the loss rather than distracts from it.
Listen to a song that holds the feeling for you.
Let the sadness exist in the room without trying to fix it.
Be gentle with yourself about how long this takes. There is no timeline.
Move your body gently, not to feel better, just to feel something.
Anger and Frustration
Go somewhere private and make noise, yell, groan, whatever needs to come out.
Walk fast, run, or do something physically demanding for a few minutes.
Write down exactly what you're angry about without editing yourself.
Splash cold water on your face.
Name the feeling under the anger. There's usually something else there.
Tear up paper or cardboard if you need something physical to do with your hands.
Take 10 slow, deep breaths before you respond to anything.
Remove yourself from the situation, even briefly, before saying or doing something you'll regret.
Ask yourself what you actually need right now.
Give yourself permission to be angry without requiring yourself to act on it.
Shutdown, Numbness, and Dissociation
Hold something cold like an ice pack wrapped in a cloth, not ice directly on skin, and focus on the sensation.
Stamp your feet on the floor and feel the ground beneath you.
Say your name, where you are, and today's date out loud.
Rub your hands together briskly and feel the warmth.
Eat or drink something with a strong flavour.
Put on something familiar in the background, a show, a podcast, a voice you trust.
Move to a different room or change your physical position.
Make eye contact with a pet, a plant, or your own face in the mirror.
Do slow, deliberate breathing and focus on the physical sensation of air moving.
Reach out to someone you feel safe with and tell them where you are.